In my eyes, looking classy and elegant is a form of art and a beautiful transformation of a girl to women. You can always look prettier by applying some makeup and wearing the glamorous outfit, however, when it comes to elegance and class, you just can’t fake it or pretend it for long. You may wonder, what EXACTLY classy and elegant means? While these terms can be a little bit vague, this is what Coco Chanel said.Elegance is when the inside is as beautiful as the outside – Coco Chanel Click To Tweet
When it comes to elegance, it’s about our inner beauty. It is the reflection of our wisdom and intelligence. I will share the traits of a classy lady in 6 aspect and there are in total 36 traits! Let’s do a little quiz here, 1 point for 1 trait that you think you have, and see how many marks you’ve gained after reading! I will share my marks at the end of the article too!
1. Be Mature
1. Don’t blame all the time and spread your negativity towards your job and others.
I know, things happen. It’s totally fine to vent your anger out sometimes but don’t let this become your habit. People will notice the one who talks bad daily because these kinds of people carry a negative spirit. The problem is they are not HAPPY with themselves. At the end of the day, WE ARE THE SOLUTION to the obstacles despite blaming on others. Trust me, we may not find the solution immediately, but we will eventually get there :’)
2. When you have difficulty, you will always try to tackle the problem yourselves before asking others for help
It feels absolutely amazing when you tackle a problem that you thought you can’t. Such a confidence boost!
3. Before you ask others for help, you have already considered the possibility of being rejected and accept it.
Because you know no one owns you anything and no one has the responsibility to take care of things for you. If they are willing to help, great, that’s a bonus. If they don’t, well, you don’t have a reason to get mad in fact.
4. DON’T ever make decision when you are mad and during midnight.
This one is huge, trust me, if you follow this rule you will save yourselves troubles and have a much easier life. Only make decisions after thorough thought and with a rational mind, when you make the decision, don’t change it anymore. This saves you many heartbreaking mental struggles and earns respect from others, too.
5. Don’t panic when something goes wrong. Instead of beating yourself up, try to solve the problems first.
It’s okay if you can’t solve the problems at last, after all, not all things are solvable in the world. What matters here is your reaction to a situation.
6. Express your emotion in the right timing
Being classy and elegant isn’t about suppressing all the emotions and pretending everything is fine even when it’s not fine. When you feel sad, just tell your friends, have a glass of wine, and cry it out. It’s not a shame to cry no matter what age you are. A classy woman always knows her emotional limits and expresses the emotion out at the right timing.It's okay to be not okay. Click To Tweet
2. Be generous
1. You won’t take people’s minor mistakes into heart.
Because you know the fact that no one is perfect, you may also make some mistakes that you totally unaware of.
2. You won’t easily leaving a negative comment to another person.
Especially when you know the fact that it’s impossible to comprehend the whole picture and your negative comment may affect that person’s life in some sort of way.
3. You can accept the negative comments people made towards you.
You accept these comments in two ways. For the comments that is true and constructive, you appreciate their honesty and reflect yourselves. For the comments that are not true, you ignore it without a second thought. You don’t even have room to feel the anger. You always know what is right and what is wrong, that’s why your life is easier.
4. You clearly know the fact that all human beings are born free and equal in dignity and rights.
No one is more superior than others despite wealth, race, knowledge, and other things. You clearly know that and this belief is deeply rooted.Never look down on anyone unless you're helping them up Click To Tweet
5. You can genuinely bless your competitor when he/she gain success.
You know the fact that without your competitor, you can’t grow to the position you now at. Instead of jealous him/her, you feel truly happy for them because you know they deserve that moment. You also know the fact when someone is jealous, other people can always sense it. A jealous woman is not so attractive.
6. You won’t be reluctant to leave a broken toxic relationship, but at the same time, you won’t talk bad your ex in front of others. You know how to respect a relationship, after all, he is the person you’ve loved.
With enough wisdom, you will eventually understand that there’s no right and wrong in a relationship. There is only a difference of perspective. If he is not the Mr. right of your life, you cried and you move on. Instead of holding anger towards the relationship, you know this experience is preparing you to meet Mr. right of your life. You can only know what is right for you when you’ve met the wrong guy. You appreciate your ex and keep the details in private. You enjoy your single time after the breakup and eventually, you know the right person will come to you.
3. Be Confident
1. You know what make up and types of outfit suits you and you have your style.
You won’t follow the fashion trend unless that trend happens to vibes your soul. Otherwise, you wear the clothes that helps you reflect your own personality
2. You understand the fact that you don’t have to BE PERFECT. You embrace your flaws and don’t feel insecure by that. After all, we, humans, are all PERFECT IMPERFECTION.We are all perfect imperfection. Click To Tweet
3. You understand yourselves. If you don’t, you will try hard working towards that.
If you know that you are not insecure about your financial situation, you will be able to identify the problem and works toward that. You won’t let your insecurities become larger and larger like a snowball effect. You always can control your insecurities by taking the first step – identify it. Facing your own insecurities aren’t very easy, but you are willing to try :’)
4. You can identity the toxic friends and stay away from them
You know your time is valuable and the last thing you want to do is staying with toxic friends. When they suck up your energy every time you meet them, you know that’s a sign to stop this “friendship”. You may feel painful to do that, but you know this relationship will be detrimental for your long term development. You can always protect yourselves by filtering your social circle…
*If you need help, feel free to check out this step-to-step guideline for handling toxic relationships from Healthline, hope that helps.You are the average of your five closest friends – choose carefully. Click To Tweet
5. You won’t please others and people’s expectation of you, you live your best life for yourselves.
You know your dreams, your goals, your traits. You know it will be ridiculous to change yourselves by listening to others comment that most of the time, they just said it without a second thought. If there is something you want to change, this is because YOU WANT TO. You always comfortable to be yourself and you are proud of that too.
6. You do things consistently because you know there’s no short cut in success.
You always view things in the long term. You know that consistency is far more important than motivation and you know success is about doing your best self not one day, but every single day. You can certainly rest during your journey, but you won’t stop trying.Consistency is what transforms average into excellence. Click To Tweet
4. Be kindBE KIND, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle you know nothing about Click To Tweet
1. You NEVER ever judge other women face and body
You won’t do that because you know girl power is a real thing. You want to be real queens and real queens fix each other’s crowns. Plus, you know how disheartening can be when you hear other people’s commenting your body part, and that’s why you won’t do that to others. Every girl is beautiful in their own ways. Period.Real queens fix each other's crowns Click To Tweet
2. Even you know you are right, you don’t have to prove it sometimes
You won’t prove yourself everywhere. You know in some cases, trying to prove that you are the best/ you are right is an insult. Plus, you don’t even have the energy and time to do that.
3. Always smile
You know a smile is the best makeup any girl can wear. Plus, you know the fact that your smile is a reason for many others to smile. Things just get better with a effortless smile and you always want to do more of that.
4. Appreciate people’s effort and LET THEM KNOW
Despite how minimal it is, you always appreciate others because you never take things granted. And you always make sure they know your appreciation because you know a simple and heartfelt “Thank you” can makes other’s day!
5. You have your bottom line and you won’t break them under any circumstances
Yes, you are always kind to others. But you also clearly understand that being kind doesn’t mean helping everyone in any situations. When some requests are going against your bottom line, you always know how to reject them.
6. Always count her blessing, everyday
You always appreciate things in life, no matter how big or how small it is. You know that gratitude is the secret of happiness in life. Feeling grateful is not easy task to do, but you are willing to invest time for journaling and meditation and make yourself feel better.Be thankful for what you have. Your life, no matter how bad you think it is, is someone else's fairytale. Click To Tweet
5. Be attentive
1.You always plan in advance
Planning in advance is gold. You know things can go really wrong if you do it last minute because you have suffered before. You always plan things in advance and that’s why you can always look calm and elegant.
2. You maintain a routine & schedule
You know maintain a routine is a way to protect your time. Your morning routines are something you enjoy the most. Instead of turning your brain to passive mood and rushing to work right after you wake up, you always serve some private time for yourselves in the morning. You know that’s not luxury, that’s a necessity. You also want to have a schedule to keep things organize and simple so you won’t get overwhelmed on Monday. (Or everyday…)
3. You don’t always have your phone around
You just don’t want to scroll your Instagram feed for hours…you always have your detox time for social media. You also know the fact phone can be really distracting when the notification keeps popping up and that’s why you always stay aware of your phone when you are working. You are proud of your little practice.
4. Break goals into smaller pieces
You know how to get things done. If the goal seems overwhelming to you, you will break your goals into smaller pieces and finish your task day by day. You won’t rush your time because you know things take time. Instead, you enjoy the journey and learn the maximum of it.
5. You know when to stop during a conversation
You can observe people during a conversation and you also know the fact that sometimes the best response is no response. When you can’t receive a response from someone, you know you should stop instead of keep asking them around. This rule can save you many embarrassing moments. You always know when to start and end a conversation, and that’s art.Sometimes the best response is no response. Click To Tweet
6. You can spot people’s emotions
Sometimes you may want to double-check your friends because you deep down know that, “I’m okay” 80% is not okay. When you sense something may go wrong, you always don’t hesitate to offer help to them and care about them. When you show up during their difficult time, you create the space for others to do the same for you one day.
6. Be accountable to yourselves
1. Keep your promise
You won’t make promise you don’t intend to keep because you know this is worse than not making any promise in the first place. Once you’ve made the promise, you will try your best to accomplish it.
2. Never stop learning
You love reading inspiring quotes during lazy Sunday, you love taking different interest classes with your friends, you love trying out new little things in life. You know that fact the learning is the key of getting satisfied and you know you should always keep learning no matter how old you are.
3. Self care is always in your routine
You know self-care is important because the most important relationship is the one with yourself. Indeed, you have your family, your friends, or even your kids to take care of, but this doesn’t mean you have to put you in a lower priority. You know you always have to take care of yourself first so you have the energy to take care of others. Always remember, a woman who knows how to take care of herself is one of the most attractive moment, people just love to be around you.How you love yourself is how you teach others to love you. Click To Tweet
4. You don’t rely on man financially
You know the importance and necessity of financial independence. Despite the fact you can rely on him, you choose to earn your money your own because it feels good. You also know the fact your world is not just about him, but also your family, your friends, your career and more. Your happiness does not solely depend on him (which is not a healthy relationship), instead, your happiness depends on YOU.
5. You know how to reward yourselves
Work hard, play hard. When you accomplished a task, it’s important to reward yourself with the things you love. Go buy that bag, get dresses up and go to that beach party, you deserve it. Rewarding yourself occasionally keeps you walkway further in your journey. After all, we are not robots, we are humans.
6. You know that you are enough
You are amazing if you are reading till this point! I know what you are thinking, “Wow…that seems really hard to be a classy and elegant woman”. You know what, this takes time, and no one born to be a classy women. At the end of the day, being classy is a reflection of wisdom and experience.
That’s a long list! So here are my 36 tips on how to be classy and elegant. I know for some of the tips, they are not especially easy. BUT, if you can incorporate some of these into your life, I can promise you your life will be way easier and happier. After all, what we want in our life is freedom and happiness right?
For the marks of this quiz, well, I am 24/36. You can tell I am still on my journey in learning these 36 tips. But I am okay with that! At least I keep trying and I am making progress despite how slow it is. Please comment down below your marks and your thought after reading these 36 traits!
We will, eventually, be the woman we always want to be. And by that time, we will celebrate each other’s success. ??
If you think more women deserve to see this post, spread that love by pinning this! Trust me, that will make a difference that you may unaware of! Some girls just need to see this message right now :’) For every classy girl/ classy girl to be that have pinned this pin, THANK YOU!